Gaia's Revenge
We are on day 4 of a week-long rain forecast. Not that it means much when you live in a rainforest. In France they say there are 365 types of cheese, one for every day of the year. In the Pacific Northwest we have 365 ways to describe rain.
Yesterday was drizzle. The day before was really raining. Whereas today it’s a cloudburst of hail, then sun, then back to hail. As a bonus we got the ever bizarre phenomenon of sun showers. I was promised thunder and lightning but alas there was none. Maybe tomorrow.
Canadians talk about the weather a lot I’ve been told. We are the second largest country in the world so we do have quite the range to discuss. What we don’t talk about enough is climate. But we aren’t alone in that, just ask Greta.
“Nature is Healing” headlines around the world are telling us. What lovely news! Sure, we are frustrated, the economy is a giant question mark, people are sick and dying… but nature is healing! All hail the wonders of the natural world!
Tens of thousands of flamingos have taken over Mumbai. A town in Wales is overrun with goats. A mailman in New England is being followed by a wild turkey on his route. The air in Los Angeles is finally free of smog.
Nature is Healing.
Kind of.
It might be more accurate to say “Nature is finally up and walking around after having humanity’s foot on its neck since the Industrial Revolution.” Or “No, the birds in your neighbourhood aren’t new, you just usually don’t stop to notice them.”
But that’s a downer. And much too long for a headline. It’s much more uplifting to say that nature is healing. To imagine that we could guzzle oil, fly planes around the planet non-stop, and use a Texas-sized amount of plastic for our whole life and then reverse all of the damage in eight weeks.
Jellyfish have been spotted in Venice is a “marvel”. Should we reconsider the structure of jobs and commuting in cities is a “difficult subject”. It’s easy to say Captain America is your favourite superhero because he’s willing to make sacrifices for the greater good. It’s harder to do that yourself when you can just buy a t-shirt and novelty mug with his face and move on.
Honestly, nature might be healing. But Mother Nature hasn’t forgotten, and she is plotting her revenge.
Allow me to introduce you to 2020s newest villain, Murder Hornets.
You may know that apiarists have been trying to warn us all about colony collapse disorder since 2006. (What? Doesn’t everyone follow Beekeepers Monthly?) Maybe you’ve planted wildflowers, or stopped using unpronounceable chemicals on your lawn. Or you think twice about killing one flying around your head. “Save the Bees” for a while was a pretty big discussion. There was even a Ben & Jerry’s flavour.
And then life happened. And now you sometimes think about it when buying honey.
Well 2020 is here to remind you. And it’s brought along a threat to our entire food production system to drive home the point. Murder Hornets! Orange and black stripes like a tiger these two inch hornets (yes, two Inch, and check a ruler it’s bigger than you think) have wings like a dragonfly and mandibles like a nightmarish speculum. They like to go into a beehive and rip all of the bees heads off. Then they feast on their bodies and young. An entire honeybee colony can be wiped out in a few hours by only a dozen of them.
But don’t worry… humans are also at risk! The Murder Hornet sting is described like having hot metal driven into your skin, and clothing is no match for it. Oh and it’s also full of venom as lethal as a snake. Good thing they nest in the ground in the forest where you are most likely to accidentally step on them during a social distance walk.
Scientists say we have two years to eradicate them or they’ll be in North America forever. So if you spot one call 1-800-SCIENCE (not a number) because oh yeah, they’re in British Columbia and Washington state. Turns out these Murder Hornets thrive in wet forests.
Isn’t it just wonderful? Nature is healing.
And it’s sending a pretty strong message. “We’ve had enough.”
